The Other Side of the Door

“How did you get that?” I asked my husband, placing my fingertip on a nasty looking bruise on his chest.

“I’m not sure,” he replied, giving me a meaningful smirk, “but I think I might have run into a cupboard door- you know, one that somebody left open.”

It’s one of those standing jokes in our house, my problem with closing things.  Doors, drawers, bottle tops – I admit it, I have a very bad habit of leaving them ajar.  We all started talking about it the other night when my daughter in law mentioned how careful my son always was to close things gently and tightly.

“Hah!” I said, pointing at my husband.  “He gets THAT from you!”  Nobody disputed my point.

So then, as is my wont, I started thinking about how that tendency of mine, that inability to close things, how that might relate to my life in general.

Well, I’m sure you see it, especially if you’ve read this post

Closing doors tightly behind you…it eliminates too many options, doesn’t it?  After all, if I close up and lock the back door every time the dogs go in or out, I’d be doing that all day.  If I close every cupboard after I get something out of it, why, I’ll just be opening it again in a few seconds to get something else.  Why make re-entry so difficult? 

But contrary to long standing habit, I just closed a door – a symbolic one, but a large and ponderous one nevertheless. 

Yes, I did it today.  All my quitting is done. I’ve told everyone who needs to be told, I’ve explained simply and with love and honesty my reasons for needing to move on.  I stood firm amidst the expected dismay and sadness and attempts to change my mind.

And I must tell you, I feel only relief, a sense of lightness and freedom such as I haven’t felt in a long time.

As well as a sense of excitement, because you know what they say about doors…

When one closes – another one opens.

And I can’t wait to see what’s behind it.

 

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10 thoughts on “The Other Side of the Door

  1. Congratulations. It sounds like the right decision, and one you’re well ready for.

    I’ve been leaving cupboards open a lot lately; not like me at all – I’m all Virgo about that stuff.

  2. It is better to close some doors, as you do not know the kind of bruise you’ll get from leaving a big one open. Glad you feel light and free!

  3. Becca, you know how much I love your attitude about life and the way you can bring everything together with words. I’m all about necessary closure and I am VERY much a proponent of the “when one door closes” theory.

    Bless you for having made those difficult calls and closed those doors. Life is an open field and that lightness you feel is your wings!!

    As for leaving things “open” — that was my mother to a “t” — can I tell you the number of times we’d hit our heads on open cupboard doors?!? Thing is — you’d have thought we’d have realized and started “looking”!!! ;)

  4. I’m so pleased for you! There are layers of meaning to be found in all of that for sure. I’m a closer of doors, too. – Feel uncomfortable left sitting in a room with an open door a lot of the time.

  5. I am a major door/drawer closer.

    And I think it’s wonderful that you followed through on your intent to lighten your load. What a relief…and a confidence builder too! Once you’ve said ‘no’ and experienced the accompanying sense of freedom, I’m sure that it will pave the way for a new measuring stick that allows you to say ‘yes’ to only those things that truly make your heart sing (and to be able to say ‘no’ when they, too, have reached their natural conclusion).

    Now, to explore like you were on Let’s Make a Deal. Try what’s behind door #1 and then trade for what’s behind door #3 if you like. :)

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